Dividing assets on divorce can be an expensive and bitter business
Cynics say marriage is the worst financial mistake most men ever make. Even if they are wrong, divorce might prove them right.
He criticised the “completely disproportionate” legal bills spent on the case by Mark Evans, a successful businessman, and his estranged wife Jenifer.
While the multi-million pound assets involved in this case are exceptional, the sad fact is that it’s not unusual for unhappy husbands and wives to reach for their lawyers. With one in three marriages now ending in divorce and the Office for National Statistics attributing a 5pc increase last year to “financial strain caused by the recession” what can divorcees do to limit the financial damage?
Alison Hawes, a partner in the family law team at nationwide lawyers Irwin Mitchell, said: “Too many people think that spending money telling lawyers to be nasty to their exes will make them feel better.
“I have been instructed to write angry letters – in one case criticising the husband for emptying the garage of all his tools and the lawn mower when he left to set up home with his girlfriend. My client wanted to point out that she could scarcely be expected to cut the grass with scissors which was all he had left behind.
“The response was that the husband would be amazed if she could find the lawn, let alone the scissors. The ping pong of correspondence degenerated very quickly into each party slinging mud not only about their roles in the house, but also their respective shortcomings in the bedroom.
“The best advice we can give clients to help them not spend hundreds of thousands of pounds is to stay as businesslike as possible and make sure they line up good emotional support as they go through the process, from family, friends and from counsellors.”
Ruth Bross of family law solicitors Bross Bennett agreed: “Perhaps there is another drama being played out here – revenge, jealousy, bitterness, greed, the desire to punish a former partner, an unwillingness to move on with their lives.
“Clients often come to me with a very rigid view of what they want to achieve, and they can become obsessed by the concept of ‘winning’ no matter what the cost – but this is a luxury that most people cannot afford.
“Of course, there some points which are worth arguing about, for example obtaining enough from a financial settlement to re-house or to meet basic outgoings. However, I have had clients who have spent thousand of pounds arguing over who keeps the furniture, crockery or pets. My advice to clients is that in the end it is always about the cost, not the principle.”
Perhaps the best way to reach a satisfactory end is to start from the right place. Simon Bruce, a partner at Farrer solicitors of Lincoln’s Inn Fields, told me: “Prevention is better than a cure. Make your best offer to settle as soon as you can. It brings difficult clients to the table and puts them under serious costs pressure if they refuse it.
“Remember, it’s a free world. You don’t have to get married. But if you do, you can choose to have a pre-marital contract to protect your assets. Only people from outer space don’t know they can protect you.
He should know. Mr Bruce represented German heiress Katrin Radmacher whose pre-nuptial agreement helped persuade the Supreme Court in London to cut her French former husband’s divorce settlement from £5m to £1m two years ago.
That set a new precedent in English law but emotional and practical problems remain. As Sandra Davis, head of family group at lawyers Mishcon de Reya, pointed out at the time: “Imposing contractual terms on personal relationships is now fine from a legal perspective; but it is still less likely to be so from an emotional perspective.
“As a nation we’re culturally uncomfortable talking about money. But negotiating the terms of a pre-nup necessitates frank and difficult financial discussions in advance of a marriage about what should happen in the event of a divorce.
“The Supreme Court has proposed that the courts should give effect to a nuptial agreement that is freely entered into by each party with a full appreciation of its implications – unless it would not be fair to hold them to their agreement.”
For example, that could exclude pre-nups which infringe children’s rights or where one partner took legal advice before signing the contract but the other did not. As a general rule, courts will seek fairness and reasonable behaviour in pre-nuptial contracts and divorce.
You don’t need to be a lawyer to recognise that, as Elizabeth Wyse, author of Debrett’s Guide to Civilised Separation, explained: “It may be tempting to throw your husband’s vintage wine down the loo or shred his best suit, but judges will take a dim view of this behaviour. Hold your head high and retain the civilised high ground.”
Finally, remember that nine in 10 divorcees manage to separate without litigation. Alimony costs mean only the very rich or very poor can afford divorce, which can prove ruinous for those in the squeezed middle.
Source: blogs.telegraph.co.uk
Texas: State voter ID law does not discriminate - AP - msnbc.com
WASHINGTON — Lawyers for the state of Texas argued Friday that a contentious voter ID law should go forward because it doesn't limit minorities' right to vote and, therefore, does not violate the federal Voting Rights Act.
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Justice Department attorneys argued just the opposite, saying the law requiring voters to show valid, government-issued photo identification at the polls is exactly the type of statute that the act, passed in 1965, was designed to prevent.
Both sides gave closing arguments Friday after a weeklong trial about the Texas law, passed last year by the state's Republican-controlled Legislature. Texas currently only requires voters to show their voter registration cards, which do not have photos, or another acceptable alternative form of ID such as a driver's license or utility bill.
Texas' voter ID law is similar to laws passed by GOP-controlled legislatures in Georgia and Indiana.
The Justice Department blocked the Texas law in March, citing the Voting Rights Act. Texas sued the Justice Department, sending the case to federal court in Washington. A three-judge panel is set to decide the fate of the law.
It's not clear when the judges will make a ruling. The presiding judge, Rosemary Collyer, said they would try to have a decision in "quick order." The judges have said they would like to rule before November's elections.
Attorney John Hughes, who argued for Texas, said the state had met its burden, showing through expert witnesses, social science studies and its own dissection of the Justice Department's evidence that there was little cause to believe any eligible voter would be unable to vote because of the ID law.
"People who want to vote already have ID or an ability to get it," Hughes said.
He said if the Justice Department's argument that thousands would be disenfranchised by the Texas law were valid, the courtroom would have been full of witnesses testifying in support of that point.
Hughes also reiterated other arguments Texas had made throughout the week: that public opinion backs voter ID laws, that Texas lawmakers had the integrity of votes — not the suppression of minority voters on their mind — when they passed the law, and that other states that have passed ID laws have not seen a drop in turnout.
The three judges hearing the case seemed skeptical of Hughes' arguments, interrupting him repeatedly with questions. Judge Robert Wilkins asked Hughes how Texas could require some rural voters to drive more than 100 miles to get a new voter ID card when under current law a person cannot be required to travel more than 100 miles for a subpoena.
Matthew Colangelo, in the Justice Department's closing argument, said Texas' law should be thrown out under the Voting Rights Act because of a number of factors, including the atmosphere in which the law was passed, statistical evidence about its effects and the fact that it creates new barriers to voting.
"It's exactly the kind of law Congress had in mind when it passed the Voting Rights Act in 1965," he said of the act, which was passed as a safeguard on minority voting rights.
Colangelo noted that the ID law in Texas was passed against a backdrop of "tremendous population growth" in the state's Hispanic community. Texas added 4 million people to its population between 2000 and 2010, he said, and 90 percent of them were Hispanics.
"Texas has acted to take away Latino voting strength as it's on the verge of growing" he said.
Colangelo cited testimony that Democrats in the Texas Legislature gave earlier in the week. They said normal rules were suspended to speed along the voter ID bill.
He also argued that the law simply made it more difficult for people to vote, calling it "a new barrier that will disenfranchise."
The judges also interrupted Colangelo at times during his closing argument, pressing him to clarify his points. But they didn't ask him as many questions as they did Hughes.
Closing arguments also came Friday from lawyers for several intervening groups who have joined the Justice Department in opposition to Texas' law. One of the attorneys, Gerald Hebert, said the law would hurt the poor. He referred to it as "merely a pretext, a cloak for voter suppression."
"It will harm the poor, the downtrodden, the destitute," he said. "How mean-spirited, how callous can you be?"
Copyright 2012 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.
Source: www.msnbc.msn.com
Divorce is painful, and can help or hurt a career - Sun Sentinel
Divorce is nearly always painful, and it can be a career killer or booster, lawyers and mediators say.
Besides the stress potentially hurting their work, those going through divorce may find their employer subpoenaed for information, their business in jeopardy or their chance for a promotion disappearing.
"You put a catastrophic or significant stumbling block in someone's life, and it affects their job," said Ken Gordon, a partner in Brinkley Morgan in Fort Lauderdale, which specializes in family law.
Divorce often is compared to a death.
"But it's the life that they knew, or the dream that they had, which is what's dying. It feels like a real death," Gordon said.
Phillip Lytle, a Hollywood police officer, went through a divorce two years ago. "It was tiring and stressful," said Lytle, 54, who was married for 20 years.
From separation to a final settlement, the divorce took about 18 months. He took refuge in the support of co-workers and friends. "That whole process is draining," he said.
Lisa Guarini owned a business with her now-former husband. During her divorce, she was locked out of her office, lost access to her computer, and finally had to shut down her business. Her husband had been the prime investor.
"It took a long time for me to get back on my feet," said Guarini, 50, who now works for a Delray Beach car dealership.
Jill Scott was a 19-year-old nurse when she met her future husband, a doctor. Twenty years later, with four children, she was facing divorce.
"My biggest challenge was finding my identity in my career after my divorce. At a relatively late age, I had to figure out what to do for a living," she said.
But Scott, 50, followed her passion for pets and now owns several businesses, including Animal Hospital at Market in Wellington. She struggled with reinventing herself, but now "I'm going after my career gangbusters."
Elinor Robin, a family mediator in Boca Raton, said people often do better in their careers after divorce.
"In the long run, divorce may ultimately prove to be a career booster. ... When the focus is off the marriage, the focus can be on the career," she said.
But family lawyer Stacy Beaulieu, in Delray Beach, said some clients find that divorce restrictions can hurt their careers. She had one client who had to pass up a promotion because it would have meant a move out of state.
Florida law requires that divorced parents with shared responsibility for children cannot move them more than 50 miles from a residence at the time of their agreement.
Divorced parents said they try to pass on their life lessons to their children. Business owner Scott tells her daughter to get an education and take care of her future.
"Marriage isn't forever sometimes. Be prepared," she said.
mpounds@tribune.com, 561-243-6650
Source: www.sun-sentinel.com
Repeal of Health Care Law Approved, Again, by House - New York Times
Source: www.nytimes.com
After Divorce Complications: Friends, Grandkids And Others - Huffington Post
Unfortunately, divorce isn't like a stubbed toe that hurts intensely at the time but fades away after a while with -- hopefully -- no scar; instead, divorce can act more like a gluten allergy --always there, lurking and waiting to be triggered, then arriving uninvited to wreak havoc on our lives at any time. When it comes to your relationships with friends, family and the grandchildren, the after- effects of divorce can be felt for a long, long time. You should, ideally, prepare now and think about how your divorce might continue to affect you in the years to come.
Here's what you need to think about in order to survive those after-divorce complications:
What About Your Friends?
Since your divorce, have you developed a new social network and your own support system? Have you been able to look at the friends you had while you were married without wondering whose side they are (or were) on? If you are continuing to question friends' loyalties, then perhaps the friendship isn't quite working for you... at least not now. As challenging as it might be, consider letting go of your old life, including your old structures and your old identity. Finding new interests, cultivating new friendships and acquaintances and having new adventures (through your church, school, adult education, sports, neighbors, etc) could bring some helpful and welcome additions to your new life.
What About "His" or "Her" Family?
Even if you were very close to your spouse's family members previously, divorce may upset each of those relationships, too. Perhaps your sister-in-law had become a good friend, your spouse's cousin was a walking buddy, or your in-laws served as childcare providers. Must you "divorce" these relationships too? Not necessarily, particularly if you are willing to talk about it. Consider having some honest conversations about how you feel about the relationship as well as your concerns for the future. For conversation openers try, "Could we go out for coffee sometime in the near future and talk about what the divorce means to you and me?" or, "I'd really like to keep taking our morning walks together -- what do you think?". If any of these conversations seem impossible now, consider merely asking permission to contact this relative or friend once the divorce process has concluded.
If you and your spouse did proceed with your divorce in a respectful and dignified way, treating each other well and encouraging your divorce professionals (attorneys, coaches, mediators, etc.) to treat each other well too, then the chances of preserving important relationships will increase. Family members of the spouse you are divorcing can most definitely continue to play a healthy and enjoyable role in your life, though the relationship will, undoubtedly, be transformed and (hopefully) evolved.
What About Those Grandkids?
Perhaps in the future, you and your ex will become grandparents. If each of you is in a new and healthy relationship (remarried or not) at that time, the issues may be minimal, but if one of you is and the other isn't, things might get complicated as some of the old divorce feelings may rear their ugly little heads. Especially if you and your ex have not had many reasons to interact since the divorce, now that you have a grandchild you may have a whole new set of experiences to share. Suddenly, you may find yourselves sitting together at religious ceremonies, in school auditoriums and on the ball field. How are you going to navigate those waters? You could learn and try new communication tools and techniques to handle this emotionally complicated situation; after all, it has probably been a while since you have had to have a civilized and polite conversation with each other over an important topic.
If any of these situations ring a bell, do the best that you can to prepare yourself. Think of it the same way you would think about going to a high school or college reunion, and prepare yourself for these after-divorce issues in the same way you would prepare for your 5th or 15th or 50th reunion; take time to think it through and make a plan.
For further guidance and ideas, visit DivorceAndRenewal.com for information on informative Tele-classes and our Spa Bootcamp Weekends.
Source: www.huffingtonpost.com
Holmes-Cruise Divorce: Spiritual, Emotional Concerns Not Unusual in Divorce, Says Top New Jersey Divorce Lawyer - YAHOO!
Weinberger Law Group believes divorce attorneys should pay attention to the spiritual and emotional concerns for clients along with their legal and financial interests.
Parsippany, New Jersey (PRWEB) July 13, 2012
As details continue to emerge from the Katie Holmes-Tom Cruise divorce, it’s clear that the spiritual upbringing of the couple’s only child, Suri, played a central role in the pair’s split. “Thrilled" by the terms of the divorce settlement reached after a speedy 11 days, Holmes is credited with carrying out a brilliant strategy to reach her goal of greater control over her daughter’s religious exposure.With such a strong focus on faith, divorce lawyers for Holmes and Cruise were called upon to help the celebrity couple grapple with a number of emotionally and spiritually complex issues. According to Bari Weinberger, founding partner of Weinberger Law Group, a New Jersey divorce law firm, this isn’t unusual; for many couples, sorting through matters of faith or dealing with emotional baggage is a primary concern in the divorce, right up there with support and custody issues.
Rather than sweep these emotional issues aside as something that can addressed in a different venue, Weinberger, likes Holmes’ legal team, faces them head on. “My idea is to pay as much attention to our clients’ emotional needs as we do fighting for their legal and financial interests. This approach has proven to help our clients move on to the next chapter of their lives with greater ease,” the Parsippany, NJ-based Weinberger explains.
Not all divorce attorneys are so in tune with their clients’ needs. However, as a judge’s clerk in the New Jersey Middlesex County Court’s family law division about 15 years ago, Weinberger witnessed firsthand how frightening the prospect of losing children and assets could be for those going through the process. “That clerkship changed the course of my life,” she says. “I saw that with the right support and a strong voice advocating on their behalf, people could be liberated and spiritually renewed.” Since then, Weinberger has devoted herself to shepherding people through the legal and psychological turmoil of divorce.
Weinberger admires the work Holmes’ legal team accomplished to reach their desired settlement terms. Whether it’s through litigation or negotiation, the goal, says Weinberger, is always to secure the best possible outcomes for clients on a case-by-case basis. “Every case has unique circumstances that need to be individually evaluated. This is why our entire staff is trained to treat each client with personalized care and attention.”
Working to expeditiously and amicably resolve each client’s emotional issues can also lead to some interesting results. Recently, for instance, Weinberger helped reconcile a potential client with his wife—rather than representing him in the divorce. “Right after I met with him, I called the opposing attorney, who had already filed documents with the court, and asked if his client would be open to discussing how to heal the relationship,” explains Weinberger, who sensed the marriage could still be salvaged. “It took a lot of time and energy, but the couple has since reconciled.”
For Weinberger Law Group, their “think different" approach has attracted a loyal -- and growing -- roster of clients. The firm’s web-site (http://www.weinbergerlawgroup.com) is a clearinghouse of free information on virtually every aspect of divorce and family law matters. Weinberger says the website has provided tremendous comfort to people at a time when they feel most alone. The group recently expanded by opening a second office in Freehold located within the Monmouth County of New Jersey and intends to continue to expand and serve the needs of their clients throughout the state. Weinberger chalks up the meteoric success of the firm to the high caliber of its team.
“We only hire people who are both compassionate and exceptional in the field,” Weinberger says. The attorneys at Weinberger Law Group are not generalists; they exclusively practice family law. “This is all we do,” says Weinberger. “We know family law -- and we know families -- inside and out. We collaborate on ideas and strategies, which creates a cohesion that helps us provide a superior level of service for our clients.”
Bari Zell Weinberger
Weinberger Law Group, LLC
(888) 888-0919
Email Information
Source: news.yahoo.com
Weather frustration at Cheltenham - SkySports
The third day's play between Gloucestershire and Essex at Cheltenham was abandoned without a ball bowled after a 3pm pitch inspection.
Although the weather had been dry, so much rain fell the previous day that there was not sufficient chance for the soaked outfield to recover.
With the sun shining and some people in the crowd expressing displeasure over the wait for play, the umpires invited one spectator onto the playing area to see for himself that conditions were unfit. The call-off announcement soon followed.
Gloucestershire were due to resume their first innings on 284-4.
Day Two
Ed Cowan helped himself to a century as Gloucestershire reached 284-4 on the second day of the LV=County Championship Division Two match against Essex at Cheltenham.
While Australia were comprehensively outplayed by England in the NatWest Series, the Tasmanian reminded an enthralled Festival audience of the depth of Australia's batting, compiling a superb 103 in the rain-affected contest.
Resuming on 51 not out, Cowan found runs hard to come by on a drying pitch and, hampered by a sluggish outfield, added 31 from 100 balls, including a solitary boundary, during an attritional morning session.
Scoring rather more quickly than his partner, Hamish Marshall raised 50 from 95 balls, finding the boundary on seven occasions to keep up the pressure on Essex.
The former New Zealand international was still there unbeaten on 72, made from 140 balls, when the rain brought a premature end to proceedings shortly before 3pm.
Gloucestershire skipper Alex Gidman missed out, falling lbw on eight to Reece Topley, who now has match figures of 3-70.
Day One
Ed Cowan celebrated the award of his Gloucestershire county cap with an unbeaten half-century as the home side reached 147-2 on a rain-affected opening day against Essex at Cheltenham.
The Australian Test batsman hit 51 not out, sharing a second-wicket stand of 109 with Dan Housego, who made a more fluent 60. Reece Topley was the only successful Essex bowler with 2-37 from 14 overs.
His first wicket arrived with the total on 23 shortly after rain had delayed the start until 1pm, Benny Howell adjudged lbw for 18, trying to force through the leg side.
David Masters was his customary model of accuracy and conceded only seven runs from his first seven-over spell from the Chapel End.
The total had moved on to 131 when Topley pierced Housego's defence with a full length ball and bowled him. The young left-arm seamer had given little away and his 14 overs featured four maidens.
Cowan eventually got to fifty off 143 balls, with seven fours and a six. Shortly after that, bad light stopped play and the heavens then opened to ensure no more was possible.
Source: www.skysports.com
Now Katie Holmes the single mother treats her little princess Suri to toys and face paint - Daily Mail
By Mike Larkin
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It is always hard to keep children happy in the midst of a divorce.
But Katie Holmes is clearly trying to do the best she can for daughter Suri, as she bought her toys and treated her to a face painting session in New York today.
No doubt the Dawson's Creek favourite will have been hoping giving the six-year-old some gifts would be a good distraction amid the upheaval of her separation from Tom Cruise.
Talk about a handful: Suri Cruise carried some new toys after a visit to FAO Schwarz with Katie Holmes in New York today
The pair enjoyed some quality time together at swanky toy shop FAO Schwarz, where the Batman Begins star could not resist indulging her little princess.
She also took her and a young friend for a lunch at Manhattan coffee shop Via Quadronno.
It appears Suri has similar tastes to her playmate, as they wore almost identical face paint, and chose similar toys.
The youngster seemed particularly taken by a unicorn, perhaps because the mystical creature was a central plot device in her devout Scientologist father's 1985 cult fantasy favourite film Legend, in which he played woodland elf-like character Jack o' the Green.
Security detail: The A-lister's daughter was closely watched by a burly guard as they made their way around town
Painted little lady: The six-year-old revealed her detailed design
It is to her credit that in the midst of the turbulence in her private life, Katie seems resolutely focused on just one thing, her daughter's well being.
Earlier in the day she treated her little girl a visit at the Children’s Museum of the Arts in New York today.
It's Suri's fourth play date this week alone - she has visited Chelsea Piers for a gymnastics class, met animals at the Central Park Zoo and enjoyed the desserts on offer at Alice's Tea Cup on the Upper East Side.
As the pair headed off today, it seemed she just wanted to be in the comfort of her mother's arms and Katie complied, scooping her up and carrying her to their destination.
Busy day: The pair visited Children's Museum of the Arts earlier in the day
Carried away: It seems Suri wanted a lift from her mother instead of having to walk
Katie was dressed casually for the day out in a pretty white top, pale skinny jeans and her favourite camel ankle boots.
Her daughter was sporting a cute dress embroidered with colourful flowers, along with a pair of pink flip flops.
Suri has not seen her father Tom Cruise, who is currently filming his new movie Oblivion in California, in around three weeks.
The two speak on the phone and the actor's lawyer said yesterday that the action star plans to see the child 'very soon'.
Mummy's girl: Katie scooped the six-year-old into her arms
Bert Fields told Radar Online: 'Tom loves his Suri very, very much, as he does his other two children. Tom is a family man, and dedicated to his children. They are the center of his world.'
Meanwhile, speculation still surrounds the estranged couple's divorce settlement.
It was reported by TMZ today that Tom has not paid Katie a lump sum in the deal.
However sources have allegedly told the website that Tom will pay ‘more than $10 million’ in child support for Suri until she is 18.
Dressed down: Katie looked pretty, if a little tired, in a white top and pale skinny jeans
Katie has sole custody of Suri as part of the settlement agreement, but the actor will have substantial visitation rights.
Speaking about their split, Scientologist Tom and Katie - who registered at a Catholic church in New York this week - released a statement saying: 'We are committed to working together as parents to accomplish what is in our daughter Suri's best interests.
'We want to keep matters affecting our family private and express our respect for each other's commitment to each of our respective beliefs and support each other's roles as parents.'
Keeping busy: Tom, pictured yesterday, is still working on his new sci-fi film Oblivion in California
Time apart: Tom's lawyer said the actor plans to see his daughter 'very soon'
Source: www.dailymail.co.uk
STOP SHOVING A CAMERA IN HER FACE FOR GOODNESS SAKE!!!! SHE IS A CHILD!!! SHE NEEDS A NORMAL LIFE!!!!
- Only my opinion, The land of free will, 13/7/2012 22:41
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