My dad had three different families, but it wasn't until I started writing about how my brother and I were affected by his impulse to extend his lineage that I understood how deep divorce ran in the Carr clan. Believe it or not, it wasn't always clear.
As a young divorcee and the sole provider for three toddlers, I wasn't exactly relationship material. So when I met someone who seemed smitten with having a ready-made family (maybe because he was adopted as a baby), I felt desperate to make it work. One night I found him lying naked on my cold gravel driveway because, as he told me, it made him feel alive, and I convinced myself I understood. Things got weirder as our relationship progressed and our ties twisted in ways I won't reveal here. Suffice it to say, in the end, even with his means and desire to take care of us, when he proposed, I thought better of it.
That decision validated a sense -- an intuition -- that I was not like my flesh and blood. Emboldened, I put some distance between destiny and myself by moving us to Paris, France. Before long, I met another expat. He got along with the kids; our relationship thrived. We were soul mates and made beautiful music together, literally and figuratively. When he wanted to get married, I chewed over the possibility for days and, amazingly, sought advice from my family back home. I guess I hadn't been far away long enough.
I called Dad, who was on his third family.
"Oh, dear," he said. "I'm not too good at this marriage game. It sounds like you love each other. What does he do?"
"He's a musician," I said.
"You know how your old pops loves music, sweetheart, but ... you already have three kids."
I tried Mom. She'd been divorced three times and lived alone. Maybe she would tell me what I wanted to hear, which was "Don't worry, darling. You're in Paris! You're not like us. You won't get divorced."
Instead she said, "His name is Joe?"
Mom's last husband, my stepdad, was named Joe. Without going into detail, I'll just say that the day after he disappeared, the FBI came to our home looking for him. Mom wanted me to have a life she hadn't. I was trying. If his name was her only objection, I at least had her on that one.
"Joe's not his real name," I said. "It's Lynn Vivian. He changed it as a joke. Get it? Joe King."
"Terry," she said. I could almost see her head shaking. "I don't know why you call me when you're going to do what you want anyway. Maybe now is a good time to tell you, Robert's getting divorced, again."
Robert was my half-brother. Mom had him with her first husband. Robert's third wife was also his second wife -- he'd already divorced her once. That's right, he was posed to marry and divorce the same person twice, in succession.
I wanted to speak to my full brother. His second marriage, as far as I knew, was solid. I asked Mom for his current phone number, and she clued me in on what was happening with him. He'd met and fallen for another woman and had figured out a way to not get divorced by asking his wife to allow his new woman to move in with them. Unbelievably, she agreed.
After assessing my odds at avoiding another divorce, I decided not to marry Joe King/Lynn Vivian or anyone else, ever. That solution seemed so genius I wondered why no one in my family had thought of it before.
I should confess, my one divorce had annihilated what little courage I possessed and going through another, I thought, would do me in completely. I was different from my family. They were made of sturdier and more resilient relationship stuff than I.
Now, with the privilege of perspective, it's clear that the only way marriage would have worked for me was if I'd been someone else. It certainly hasn't prevented me from embracing another Carr trait: love and loving love.
And, by the way, I'm not laying out my family's divorce history as some kind of badge of freakiness. In fact, I'll wager there are some with an even more diverse and colorful record in that department than ours. If so, please, do tell.
Source: www.huffingtonpost.com
London 2012: Teenage weightlifter Zoe Smith makes Team GB - BBC News
Commonwealth bronze medallist Zoe Smith will make her Olympic debut this summer after being named in the five-strong GB weightlifting squad for London 2012.
Smith, 18, achieved the Olympic A standard twice and finished fourth at April's European Championships.
"I'm elated to have been selected for the team," said Greenwich-born Smith.
"It has been a nerve-wracking period ahead of selection, so I'm glad that I've secured my place to say I'll be representing Team GB!"
The teenager will be joined in the squad of five by veteran Welsh lifter Natasha Perdue.
GB weightlifter and Leeds City council worker Natasha Perdue
The 36-year-old who combines training with full time work at a refuse collection centre in Leeds will be following in the footsteps of her father, Terry, who competed at the 1968 and 1972 Olympics.
"I can't describe in words how happy I feel and I keep pinching myself to make sure I'm not dreaming," said Perdue.
"I waited two weeks for the call, and when it came I didn't want to answer it in case it was bad news.
"I asked them to repeat it about three times just to make sure."
Scotland's Commonwealth silver medallist -94kg Peter Kirkbride is the highest profile lifter in the three-strong men's squad.
The 24-year-old has endured a difficult 18 months after a series of injuries disrupted his training regime, but he hopes to be back to peak form by the Games.
GB weightlifting squad
Gareth Evans - Men's 69kg (26, Holyhead)
Peter Kirkbride - Men's 94kg (24, Hurlford)
Jack Oliver - Men's 77kg (21, Bexleyheath)
Natasha Perdue - Women's 69kg (36, Swansea)
Zoe Smith - Women's 58kg (18, London)
"I'm excited to find out about being selected as part of the team," said Kirkbride.
Winning Commonwealth silver was a great moment for me, and I hope to perform better than I did in Delhi."
Wales' -67kg lifter Gareth Evans, who left both his family and full-time job up to move to Leeds and train full-time with the GB squad, joins Kirkbride in the Olympic team.
"I'm ecstatic," he said. "It is testament to the sacrifice I have made and the hard work I have put in over the years.
"I would just like to thank everyone who has supported me so far."
Despite struggling at the Olympic trials in May, 20-year-old Jack Oliver is included in the team as a result of his promising displays over the past 18 months, which included British records at the World Championships.
"I feel ready to rise to the occasion and try to make my country proud," said Oliver.
The weightlifting events will take place between 28 July and 7 August at London's ExCel Centre at this summer's London 2012 Olympic Games.
Source: www.bbc.co.uk
Euro 2012: London fire safety posters translated - BBC News
Foreign language posters have been produced to target the problem of people causing kitchen fires while drunk during the Euro 2012 tournament.
London Fire Brigade (LFB) said it hoped to prevent the city's different nationalities leaving cooking unattended after drinking.
The posters come in seven foreign languages including Polish and Russian.
It is the first time translations have been used for an international competition, said LFB.
'Diverse city'The fire brigade's research shows drunk Londoners cause two fires a day.
It also shows a quarter of those who die in fires have alcohol in their systems and over half of alcohol-related fires happen because someone has fallen asleep.
Posters featuring the slogan "Goal" above a burger, will appear in pub lavatories across central London.
The posters have been produced in French, Polish, Ukrainian, German, Russian, Portuguese and Spanish.
They have been sent to different nationality newspapers in London, said LFB.
A spokesman for LFB said that the idea to translate posters was prompted by the BBC's story on London being considered France's sixth biggest city in terms of population.
He said: "London is a diverse city. It's not just England fans at risk.
"There was no extra cost and it will get the message out."
London Fire Brigade's commissioner, Ron Dobson, said: "During Euro 2012, many Londoners will go straight from work to the pub to watch the football.
"Our research shows cooking after having one too many plays a massive part in house fires and, sadly, one in every four fire deaths involves alcohol."
Source: www.bbc.co.uk
London Hit by Flooding Following Heavy Rain - lbc.co.uk
Monday 11th June 2012
London Fire Brigade had already dealt with more than thirty cases of flooding by early afternoon after some areas saw the average rainfall for the whole of June fall in just 12 hours.
The number is more than double the usual daily calll outs for flood related reasons.
The brigade says it has 15 tonnes of sand ready to be sent out from its distribution centre in Croydon in the event of serious flooding.
The Environment Agency has issued 11 flood alerts for London while the Met Office has issued an Amber warning - the second highest possible - with surface water flooding, localised river flooding and very difficult driving conditions likely.
The flooding caused difficulties for drivers and trains in and around the capital this morning.
Head of road policy at the AA - Paul Watters - has been telling LBC 97.3 it is unpredictable.
"The trouble is with flooding is it can be clear in one place and very deep water in the next, which causes major gridlock," he explained.
"Also drivers braking down, of course, which adds to the problem. We certainly did know about it, we certainly did have the authorities ready for but the system can't cope. It's just like snow in a way."
Source: www.lbc.co.uk
London Broncos 28 Widnes Vikings 24 - runcornandwidnesweeklynews.co.uk
Jun 11 2012 by Daniel Mckenzie, Runcorn and Widnes Weekly News
A LAST-GASP Antonio Kaufusi try denied Widnes their first away win of the season against London at the Twickenham Stoop on Saturday.
The Broncos prop touched down in the final seconds of the match to lift his side above the Vikings and off the foot of the Super League table.
Widnes were on the back foot for large periods of the game – especially in the first half – but went into the break level at 12-12 and lead by two points going into the final minute.
Then, with the final play of the game, Kafusi powered his way through an exhausted Widnes defence to break the hearts of the hundreds of travelling Vikings fans.
The Vikings got off to a flying start and Cameron Phelps opened the scoring after two minutes.
Phelps, again playing at full-back in Shaun Briscoe's absence, burst onto John Clarke's well-timed pass to touch down to the right of the sticks. Ah Van added the extras.
But straight from the restart a Widnes mistake gifted London possession and the Vikings were made to work hard in defence to shut out three repeat sets.
The home side continued on the front foot and eventually turned pressure into points when Craig Gower touched down after 13 minutes. Jason Golden levelled the scores with the conversion.
After 20 minutes of stalemate, in which Widnes struggled to get out of their own half, London took the lead when Omari Caro finished off a well-worked last tackle move.
But the Vikings sparked into life in the closing stages of the half and Frank Winterstein popped up with a collector's item of a try seconds before the hooter.
Winterstein used all of his 18-stone frame to power his way to the line after Ah Van had gone close. The successful conversion meant the side's went in level at the break 12-12.
The Vikings started the second half in similar vein to the first, with Phelps again crossing in the early stages after good work by Jon Clarke.
The scores were level once again five minutes later when substitute forward Tony Clubb powered over a break by London's pacey winger Kieran Dixon.
Paddy Flynn then denied Dixon what looked to be a certain try with an outstanding last ditch tackle.
Widnes then had several chances to reestablish their lead in a long period of possession but first Paul McShane and then Ah Van had tries chalked off by referee Robert Hicks.
They did eventually get their noses in front however when Winterstein completed his brace with an hour played, latching onto Rhys Hanbury's precision pass.
Ah Van then had a chance to put a bit of daylight between the two sides but was off target with a penalty from 45m out.
Moments later Paddy Flynn came up with yet another try-saving tackle moments later, again denying Dixon and forcing the error.
And when Daniel Sarginson crossed for London with just seven minutes left to played, it looked as though the Vikings had been denied securing back-to-back victories for the first time this year.
But from the conversion Golden missed the chance to tie things up, leaving Widnes two points ahead with minutes to play.
However, with the final play of the match Antonio Kaufusi powered his way through the tiring Widnes defence to win the match for his team in the most dramatic fashion.
Vikings coach Dennis Betts said: “We have to stay philosophical about it. Last week we won a game in the last minute and this week we lose in the last minute.
“I thought we did enough to deserve something from the game, although we did have to spend a lot of our time defending and that took a lot of energy out of us.
“I'm really disappointed as this was a great opportunity to push ourselves away from the foot of the table and we have not taken it.”
Source: www.runcornandwidnesweeklynews.co.uk
London 2012 Olympics: Tom Daley confirmed in Britain's Olympic diving squad - Daily Telegraph
He said: “I can’t wait to see the home crowd. There’ll be 17,500 people all behind us wanting us to do well and I can’t wait to hear the noise they’ll make.
“A home Games is a once in a lifetime opportunity and I really can’t wait to get onto those boards at the Aquatics Centre again.”
But Gladding's attempt to compete in the 10m individual in her first Olympics, just 18 months after she almost died following an accident at a diving competition in Russia, could be under threat.
Reports suggest her place is set to come under appeal from 10 metre platform rival Tonia Couch.
Couch, who will go to London in the platform synchro, and her coach Andy Banks have revealed their anger at the decision after being overlooked by a British Diving selection panel headed by controversial performance director Alexei Evangulov.
She had beaten Gladding into third place at the British Gas Diving Championships - which doubled as the Olympic qualifiers - at the weekend and was last night in tears after being informed of the decision.
But British Diving were still to receive official notification of an appeal, with Couch, who reached the 2008 Olympic final, having 48 hours to lodge any complaint.
Banks made public their dissatisfaction today, though, saying: "I feel, quite strongly, that she [Couch] has demonstrated over the course of this year that she is still the UK's premier platform diver - she has been since 2008."
Couch used her Twitter page to say: "Picked 4 syncro but not for individual. I dived my socks off with a PB and came 2nd, had the best year yet not been picked for 2012 £gutted."
Gladding's selection had loomed as an emotional choice after she almost died in February last year following the freak accident at a diving competition in Russia.
The 30 year-old had to be dragged to safety from the bottom of the diving pool after hitting her head on the concrete 10m platform and plummeting unconscious into the water.
She said: "I have had many ups and downs to get to today's announcement.
"It has taken a lot but I am now fully back, ready and excited to put on my Team GB tracksuit.
"It really is a dream come true."
Couch will also focus on her partnership with Sarah Barrow in the 10m synchro. The pair became Britain's first women's European diving champions in Eindhoven last month and are expected to push for a podium place.
Rebecca Gallantree and Nick Robinson-Baker were picked for their second Olympics, while rising star Jack Laugher heads a list of four teenagers heading to their first Games along with Chris Mears, Hannah Starling and Alicia Blagg.
The Olympic diving events begin on July 29 before finishing with Daley's platform final on August 11.
The Great Britain Olympic Diving team:
Tom Daley – 10M Individual and 10M Synchronised
Peter Waterfield – 10M Individual and 10M Synchronised
Chris Mears – 3M Individual and 3M synchronised
Nick Robinson-Baker – 3M Synchronised
Jack Laugher – 3M individual
Alicia Blagg – 3M Synchronised
Rebecca Gallantree – 3M Synchronised
Hannah Starling – 3M Individual
Tonia Couch – 10M Synchronised
Sarah Barrow – 10M Synchronised
Stacie Powell – 10M Individual
Monique Gladding – 10M Individual
Source: www.telegraph.co.uk
Shrinking star: Frankie Essex's diet is obviously working as she shows off her even slimmer frame in bikini in Marbella - Daily Mail
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She's worked hard on her figure over the last few weeks, even enduring a fitness boot camp to get her into shape for Marbella.
And Frankie Essex is clearly enjoying showing off the fruits of her labour now she's on holiday.
The Only Way Is Essex star has been snapped revealing her ever shrinking frame in a halterneck bikini.
Bikini body: Frankie Essex shows off her even slimmer frame in a bikini on holiday in Marbella
Washboard stomach: The TOWIE star showed off her slender body as she lapped up the rays
Frankie lapped up the rays as she paddled in the waves and seemed to have lost even more weight than previously.
The TOWIE star wore a black bikini with jewelled detailing as she frolicked in the water.
And she ensured she looked her very best for the beach outing as she wore her hair high in a knot bun.
Splashing around: Frankie Essex appeared body confident as she flaunted her figure for all to see
Poser: The Only Way Is Essex star has been in Marbella with her castmates
Frankie strutted her stuff across the sand and showed her slender stomach even more when she breathed in as the cold splashes touched her skin.
And the reality star seemed to be aware how good she looked as she stood in a number of poses for onlookers and photographers to see.
She stood with her back against a tree as she stretched up to scrape her hair back.
Svelte: Frankie has lost a couple of dress sizes in the lead up to her holiday in the Spanish resort
Strutting her stuff: Frankie Essex showed off the fruits of her labour after a four-day fitness boot camp several weeks ago
Lounging around: Frankie ensured she looked her best as she sunbathed in front of the cameras
And Frankie later stretched her body out across the sand to display her washboard stomach.
When she left the beach she decorated her hair with a big pink flower and draped a matching shawl around her arms.
It comes just a couple of weeks after a four day work out at the No.1 BootCamp with pal and co-star Lauren Goodger in the lead up to their holiday.
And she's obviously become body confident as a result of her continuing weight loss.
Showbiz roundup...
Source: www.dailymail.co.uk
London Irish forward Gibson on bench for England - Reading Evening Post
Jamie Gibson has been named among the England replacements for their tour match against the South Africa Southern Barbarians in Kimberley on Wednesday (2pm kick-off).
The absence of London Irish team-mate Jonathan Joseph suggests he could start the second Test.
The 21-year-old centre impressed after coming off the bench for the final few minutes in Saturday's 22-17 defeat in Durban.
He was involved in England's solitary try and, with Brad Barritt and Mike Brown both ruled out, is a contender to start in Johannesburg on Saturday.
His pace helped create a last-gasp try for Ben Foden and he showed his promise to fuller effect a fortnight earlier against the Barbarians when he scored two tries.
England coach Stuart Lancaster said: “Getting JJ on gave us a little spark that ignited a try.
"This is a tour to win games, clearly, but it’s also a tour to look at players and options."
Joseph was dubbed “the next Jeremy Guscott,” by his then coach at London Irish, Mike Catt, who, is now in charge of England’s attack.
“JJ is special, he creates something out of nothing,” Catt said. “His footwork is phenomenal and his ability to do things at pace creates space for others.
"He hardly ever makes an error, which is what distinguishes a great player from a good player.
"And, no, I’ve not saddled him with the Jerry Guscott tag because that’s something he’s going to have to cope with. He knows how good he can be.”
Alex Corbisiero, the other Exiles player in the 42-man party, has yet to feature due to a knee injury.
England also have a match against SA Barbarians North on June 19 before the third and final test in Port Elizabeth on June 23.
England (v South Africa Southern Barbarians): 15 Alex Goode; 14 David Strettle (both Saracens), 13 Anthony Allen (Leicester), 12 Jordan Turner-Hall (Harlequins), 11 Christian Wade (Wasps); 10 Charlie Hodgson (Saracens), 9 Danny Care (Harlequins); 1 Matt Mullan (Worcester), 2 Joe Gray (Harlequins), 3 Paul Doran Jones (Northampton), 4 Graham Kitchener (Leicester), 5 George Robson (capt, Harlequins), 6 James Haskell (Otago Highlanders), 7 Carl Fearns (Bath), 8 Thomas Waldrom (Leicester).
Replacements: 16 Tom Youngs (Leicester), 17 Rupert Harden (Gloucester), 18 Tom Palmer (Stade Francais), 19 Jamie Gibson (London Irish), 20 Lee Dickson (Northampton), 21 George Lowe (Harlequins), 22 Nick Abendanon (Bath).
Source: www.getreading.co.uk
Who is she and what is she famous for?...What has she done to make her a celebrity?...I appeared in the crowd on the local news once when I was a kid, does that mean I'm a celebrity?
- PY, Norfolk, 11/6/2012 20:05
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